Well, I guess we're off to the old factory. I hate that place.

.


Go Gators! Beat Kentucky!

I miss the heck out of the girls when they're at Dave's for the Thurs-Sun night stretch. Yeah, after a weekend when it's been all Lord of the Flies around here, I'm happy when Thursday comes and I know I have a night off, but I already miss them on Friday night :)

I'm not really focused today, so it's just going to be a couple links. I tried to find a good video of the Gator Chomp for y'all, and especially for Erica, whose heart will be broken as she cheers for the Wildcats today, but they're all grainy and wobbly.

Oh - and hey - remember all my posts about The Smell? Well, I smelled it Thursday night and yesterday I got a migraine! I'm super excited because there's a documented connection between them and I have a term: olfactory aura. I need to start keeping better track, because I do get migraines, I do smell The Smell, and there's usually a somewhat cyclical element to it. But yay to a possible explanation! I totally couldn't afford / didn't have time for some of the scarier reasons for the not-really-there smell.

And now for something completely different ...

If you're in the Austin area, and looking for work, there's a career fair coming up at Amplify Credit Union the week of October 5th. We've got the usual 10 classes, with some great new speakers lined up, and two bonus classes this go 'round.

Here's a link to the class descriptions and the RSVP: http://octobercareerclasses.eventbrite.com/ You'll definitely want to RSVP for these as seating is limited.

Here's a link to the Career Fair RSVP: http://octobercareerfair.eventbrite.com/ For this, an RSVP is less necessary, and you can sign in when you arrive. If there are specific industries you're looking for, leave me a comment this weekend, as I'll be calling around to fill up the final 4-5 booths on Monday. The cool thing about the career fair is that the companies and recruiters in attendance have to be actively hiring and not just collecting resumes.

(The linkies have maps / address / times / dates of the classes and career fair, as well)

The fabulous Camille is doing a Giving Tree giveaway over at her blog. It's been so long since I've read that book ... I'm headed to the library this a.m. to see if I can grab a copy for Monday night's story time. It's no light anatomy & physiology read, I'm sure, but hopefully Bean will approve even without SEM pics of macrophages. At least she loves trees.

Anyone doing anything super fun this weekend? I'm headed to a Cystic Fibrosis Fundraiser and Auction over at Vino100 this afternoon. Until then, I'll be cleaning up a weeks' worth of the Destructo Girls' work.
.

I wasn't gonna use violence. I don't always use violence. Do I?

.
Doing clean up the other night, Bean observed: "There are 34 Bristle Blocks, mommy."

So, naturally, I asked if she had counted all of them, to which she replied: "No, I used my imagination and I counted them in my brain! I practice-ed, and practice-ed until I got it right."

Not bad, kiddo.

Sadly, as we discussed what she was bringing for show-and-tell, she decided on baby Cheerilee, the fan-flippin-tastic talking MLP she got for her bday. Not her take-apart human torso, not her tree book, not her body puzzle or even her "biology book with the baby being born!". I'd have been happy if she even took the "mommy" horse, whose boobs were actually boy parts. But no. Baby Cheerilee. Ah well, she is only 4 after all.

So I dropped her off Wednesday morning, and reminded her the next two nights were with daddy, as I had a couple functions to attend.

Wednesday night was some 'Texas Music & Film Playmakers Social' at The Ranch downtown. I wasn't looking forward to the event, but ended up having a blast and meeting a few interesting folks. Last night I was supposed to go to a Door64 happy hour, but ended up leaving work early because I felt like crap - no fever, just a lot of nausea. I was also smelling The Smell all day long, even at work.

I'm a bit better today, and thankfully, no Smell, but I may be in for a parent-teacher conference later today. More on this when I'm not about to head to work, but apparently, Bean had a meltdown and kicked a teacher, then, as she was running away, kicked a kid's head. She also whacked her dad in the face. I need to understand how it all went down, get the teachers' sides and get Bean's side, but I'm a bit perplexed how to handle this, and wondering if anyone else is seeing/has seen stuff like this around 4 years and how they handle(d) it ...

Help!
.

You smelled the smell?

.
In case you've missed the fab site, Awkward Family Photos (and if you have, prepare to set aside some time to peruse every picture there) get thee to this URL: http://awkwardfamilyphotos.com/?p=1459

Legen - wait for it - dary. Seriously. They thought this was a great idea when they did it ... it's no full-body fur suit with genitalia, but it's definitely a ... ... well, it's a choice.

Yay. It's back.

That funky smell that only I smell and that follows me everywhere. And, of course, the accompanying eye burn/watering and mild headache. The fact that my eyes react too makes me a little less concerned that I'm crazy or I have a massive brain tumor (because google olfactory hallucination and I'm either a total nutjob or, you know, on death's door), and makes me wonder if there's some type of allergen in the air that I'm just acutely sensitive to. Maybe it's mold. Whatever it is it's eve.ry.where.

I borrowed Bean from Dave to take her to a BBQ at a friend's yesterday, and everything was fine until it came time to leave. Bean freaked out and melted down, hitting and screaming. Got her loaded in the car after more hitting and an attempt at running of and she whacked me in the face. Good times. She finally mellowed enough to tell me she wanted to stay with me and not go back to daddy's.

So I talked her down and told her that I was sorry that having two homes was so hard on her, yadda, yadda, yadda. Becuase that's what it seems to be to her - just Dave and I blowing smoke up her ass and her life, on occasion, sucking beyond the telling of it.

It breaks my heart that this has become so hard for her. I'm not sure why, or what can really be done except to empathize without apologizing too much. By that I mean I think it's okay to tell her "I'm sorry this is so hard for you" but I never say "I'm sorry your dad and I got divorced". Seems an odd distinction, I guess, but to me there's a difference between validating her feelings (the former) and apologizing for something that, one, I don't really have to apologize for and two, I don't think *should* be apologized for. At least not in the context of conversations with Bean.

If I apologize for the divorce, that casts it in an even more negative light, if that makes sense? That it's something to apologize for gives it weight, in a bad way. But if I empathize when she feels bad, it's giving what she feels weight, and that's good. It makes a lot more sense in my head than it does when I'm trying to explain it ... maybe it's my insane brain tumor talking ...

I like to be as forthright and honest with her as I can be, but I hold back a bit when it comes to this kind of stuff. Maybe 'hold back' isn't the right choice of words, but you know what I mean, right? When she asks "why did you have to get divorced?" she doesn't need 'the truth'. She needs the mutual decision party line of "sometimes grownups can't live together anymore/stop loving each other/whatever."

Does that make sense? I hope I'm doing this right ...
.