I lie awake every night ...

Last night was one of those 'can't sleep' nights. I wasn't thinking on anything earth-shattering, but you know those nights when your brain is just kind of like one of those sped-up clock montages? Where the hands go sweeping around and pictures fly by? It was kind of like that. At midnight I gave up on laying there and tried to read myself to sleep, but was up until 2:00 anyways. Then the kidlets started to stir around 5:30 ... I think I'll be hitting the Starbucks bar at work today.

I awoke, with foggy brain, to Bean saying "Mommy, I tried to explain starcasm to C at school but he didn't understand. I said: 'when I say 'I really love it when you hit me', it's not a joke and I don't really mean it. That's starcasm.' But he didn't understand even though I explained it the best I could."

Yes folks, she did.

In the car, I've been trying to modulate my ... err ... *reactions* to drivers being total PITAs, so I've employed my favorite tool, sarcasm. Things like "Thanks a bunch for pulling out in front of me and then driving really slow. It makes the drive more challenging and therefore more fun!" instead of what I'd historically say, "$%#@#^ %^%$%#!!" Neither is great to teach children, but sarcasm at least won't have her excommunicated.

After a few of my 60's-housewife-style sarcastic deliveries (by that I mean, said with a smile and a saccharine sweetness, which all 60's housewives use in my head) thanking drivers for being so very skilled at what they do, Bean asked "Why did you say that? You aren't really happy they did that." I then got to explain sarcasm; I can't wait for the email I'll get from her dad when she tries it on him. Ooo - see Bean? It's just that easy.


Julia said...

so very stepford of you, no sarcasm there ;)

Sorry you had such a rough night.

Vivian said...

hehehe... Bean is such a neat kid. She'd be fun to have in class. I totally get she'd make me crazy sometimes, still it would be worth it.
Hope you get some sleep tonight.

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