Don't be nervous. Do what I do, just picture yourself naked.

.
Ugh. I am so glad Dave will be taking the girls tonight and I can just take a long, hot bath and then get a solid night's sleep. I got a decent amount of sleep last night, but since it was fractured by O's frequent wakings, it wasn't all that restful - especially when I'm trying not to get majorly sick.

O is still asleep, even tho Bean's been up almost an hour now. Around 2:00 I moved us back into Bean's room, where O slept until 5:30-ish, then came up to nurse and crawled back down to pass out in her crib. Once I knew she was out, I let Bean get up. Tho keeping her quiet is much more difficult than you would imagine. If she's not wanting to play with her people and horses (who are all now shopping in the pony corral), she's banging crap around in the living room. The girl simply cannot be quiet. At all. Ever. Try reading to her these days - if she's not asking a kajillion questions based on the page you're on, she's asking you to point out words and hollering them along with you. I know it's a great skill, and that the questions are good, but when you just want to knock out a story before Screamy Screamerson decides she has had *enough*, it's sometimes tempting to but the kibosh on the chatter.

So, about the job. Bean's school doesn't actually do P/T in the afternoons, so I'll be starting P/T on Wednesday, when my folks will be back in town and able to watch O in the afternoons. That will let me take her in a few times during the week, just to get her a little acclimated. Honestly, at her age, I don't know what good any sort of short-term warm-up does, other than get her used to the provider's face. Dave will be doing the first real drop-off, which seems kind of karmically fair, and I'll get to rescue her in the afternoon.

So I'll do Wed, Thurs, Fri afternoon next week, then start full-time the following Monday. I'm a little freaked out, now that it's all sinking in, and fighting the urge to call and say "nevermind!"

The job is almost perfectly tailored to my diverse background, and is that crucial first step in knitting it all together under a cohesive single banner. It's kind of corporate communications meets PR meets event planning meets some admin-type stuff. That's the briefest description I can give you. A lot of stuff I've done, in some vein or another, mixed with one or two things I've learned about doing and one or two things I've never done.

I'm plunging head-first into the deep end of going back to work, rather than my preferred method (in theory) of easing back in. But since I'm a procrastinating visionary (read: lots of ideas and things I want to do, just no movement toward actually *doing* any of them), we all knew this was how it was going to turn out, didn't we?

I'm so disappointed I didn't get to use my new resume (done by the fabulous Liz at Ultimate Resumes - thanks Liz!), but with no job lasting forever anymore, it's a good investment anyways. In the back of my head, I was thinking "I know as soon as I pay for this, I'm going to get a job that never even sees it" - that just seems to be the way Murphy's Law always play out for me. Regardless, it was money well spent :)

I can't believe I'm going to be done with play dates, park dates and lunches with friends :( Man, this is going to be one hell of a transition for me, isn't it? I'm envisioning a week of fast food and a total disaster area at home for the first full-time week. The girls and I will be getting home when I'm usually starting the bedtime routine. At least for Wed-Thurs-Fri next week, we wil be able to start the later nighttime routine and adjust to later mornings without the get-to-work scramble.

Ack. This is all going to work out, right?
.